I finally gave voice to my state of mind.
I’m depressed. And I really don’t feel like writing, but I’m depressed.
Reason: I have to live through the fucking 1950’s all over again. Only now it’s not just me being called names and threatened with bodily harm. It’s a whole lot of people, a ton of them not POC, but other marginalized folks as well. I’m massively, thoroughly exhausted.
This is the underbelly of my country. And it IS my country. And while I can get next to the words of “Still I Rise” it feels like a fuck-ton of work and my body is already tired from hauling around the shit my country heaps on Black bodies.
Eight years ago white conservatives were repelled by Rev. Wright’s ‘God damn America’ sermon. I wonder how many of them feel about our America doing a 180 on its foundational aspirations, you know, like the ones found in the national anthem? Guess they really couldn’t stand the heat of the truth Jeremiah Wright laid down.
While they are so concerned about ‘liberty’ I think their actions say so much about their disregard for ‘justice’. If they have any concern at all about their God’s vision of how they are operating I wonder how they absolve themselves of how they treat the ‘others’ in their version of our country.
I’m visualizing a shit-ton of red, white, and blue in hell…
Meanwhile I am journaling a lot. My latest exploration is the concept of ‘Grace’. More soon.